from KeelyNet 04/02/93
       courtesy of David Grant


                                 RULES OF REVENGE

       (1) Never use the H-Bomb first
           The Bomb can be anything from signing the creep up for a million
           mail order  catalogues  and magazine subscriptions to kidnapping
           children.

       (2) Take your time about getting even
           What's the rush? The creep will be busy shafting others, will be
           kept busy ravaging the rest of  the  human  race 'til you get to
           him/her.  Letting   some  time  lapse  gives   the   target   an
           opportunity to  think  he/she  got  away  with  it. In vengeance
           circles we call this lulling  the  yotz  into  a  false sense of
           security. Also, it makes it less likely that  you'll  be  tagged
           with the blame for whatever horror finally befalls the deserving
           degenerate.

       (3) If you  want  revenge  against  a monolithic business structure,
           don't bother with the schleppers  on  the  bottom who are thrown
           into the fray as cannon-fodder just to delay  you  and  turn you
           aside from the real culprits.

           Don't expend  your  creative energies on low-level management or
           toadies.  On thing, it's useless to torment innocents whose only
           crime is working for the _real_ slimeball, and two, it will look
           better if you do go down in flames  for  your actions. Save your
           energies for number four...

       (4) Try to have some fun with your revenge. By making it seem antic,
           it will weigh in your favor when the authorities come for you.
           Go figure.  It goes with number three in the fact  that it could
           save your  ass.  Hey,  what  the  hell,  it's your revenge. It's
           generally time consuming, so have fun.

       (5) Make sure  they  know you're  capable  of  ANYTHING.  Make  them
           understand this   is  war.   The  saying  goes,   "attitude   is
           everything". Few people fear the sane.

       (6) Your target  will  invariably  provide you with the means to get
           even.  Everyone makes mistakes.  Keep  an  ear to the ground and
           your nose in the wind.

       (7) It's not enough merely to get even.
           Do it the "Chicago way". He pulls a knife, you  pull  a  gun. He
           sends one  of  yours  to the hospital, you send one o'his to the
           morgue. It  lets  the target know  who  he/she's  dealing  with.
           However...

       (8) An eye for an eye is the best yardstick for revenge.
           If someone steals your watch, you don't shoot him  in  the head.
           That's not  even up. But an eye for an eye is okay if you add an
           eyelid for interest.

       (9) There are some people one should never screw with.

           There's ALWAYS someone better than you.