|-----------------------------------------------------------------------------| Memo to Moses from HEW by James E. Mignard, Ph.D. The HEW staff has reviewed your application for permission to undertake a project on desert living and thinks it has some merit. However, we cannot approve it as it stands because you have not interfaced with Federal rules and regulations on socially-oriented proposals and have failed to meet several government standards. A reading team studied your program carefully. Their criticisms and recommendations in the following paragraphs will help you understand our concerns. You may want to rewrite the proposals according to our suggestions. First of all, it is not clear to us whether your ten words, or "ten commandments," as some of our staff call them, are guidelines for a bonafide program for governing people in a nomadic societal setting. We assume they were MORE than guidelines; therefore, we must point out that we do not approve social programs that have been designed without assistance of consultants who have been certified by HEW. The regulations require that experts with doctorates and at least ten years experience be consulted whenever a proposal writer deals in areas in which he/she has NO professional competence. You speak, for example, of family relationships, neighbors and "the sojourner who is within your gates" (tidy up this phrase a bit), the OBVIOUS domain of sociology, but you have not listed a single sociologist as a consultant. There is no evidence that you sought the advice of lawyers when you drafted the sections on killing and stealing. We think a scholar with a national reputation in ethics could have improved what you were trying to say about bearing false witness and committing adultery. And was there a good reason for avoiding theologians when you wrote about having no other gods or not taking the divine name in vain or not making graven images? Your failure to utilize professional testimony SERIOUSLY WEAKENS the proposal; indeed, if we WERE to approve it, our own experts advise ue that it would not last more than four or five years. More specifically, we question the SOUNDNESS of many of your ideas. Take the phrase, "You shall have no other gods before me." Not only is this unclear, but we are troubled by the absence of measurable behavioral objectives. How will you know whether this is being accomplished? Do you plan to administer pre- and post-tests, or will you use some kind of peer review? If this idea is valuable, why is it so negative? In fact, why have you EMPHASIZED the negative in these propositions? We believe your proposal would be more easily implemented if it were recast in POSITIVE terms. The "graven image" statement. We are puzzled by the weight you give this both in terms of the number of words you have used and its position among the ten. Did you prioritize? Does it really belong in SECOND place? Is it necessary to include the THREATS? Furthermore, as you surely know, a needs assessment must accompany every application submitted for HEW approval, but you have NONE. Without supporting data, we have no way of knowing whether there is a genuine "graven image" problem among your people. Please DETAIL this in an appendix with charts, bar grams, histograms and statistics. "Taking the name in vain" is a fuzzy expression. A couple of good footnotes on recent research in Near Eastern onomastics would show that you know what you're talking about. The "sabbath day" paragraph seems overly long and of questionable value. What exactly do you mean by "remembering" the sabbath day? How is "holy" to be understood? Have you considered a more modern word like "unstressful"? Our proposal readers were DISMAYED that you have chosen to stay with the nuclear family concept. Please review the literature. "Honor father and mother." If this section is crucial to your project, we suggest you define HONOR. Is there some reason why father precedes mother in the rank-ordering? You state that compliance will affect the lives of the people "in the land which the Lord your God gives you." We studied this strange notion and could not determine the significance of real estate here. Are you implying that there is a direct relationship between parent-honoring and land-holding? In the opinion of the HEW staff, the next five statements could be lumped together, using, however, less FLAMBOYANT language. Verbs like KILL, COMMIT ADULTERY, STEAL, LIE and COVET do NOT sit well with most people. In our overall examination of your proposal we were struck by the fact that you have made NO provisions for the utilization of role-models. We do not think that asking the people to follow your ten points simply because it please God is an effective substitute for role-models. If you had attended one of our regional workshops, you would have learned that we do not approve projects that are weak on role-modeling. Finally, we wish to point out that the rules and regulations stipulate that fourteen typed copies of the proposal be sent to us. Several HEW staff members were upset because you disregarded this. Two stone tablets with chiseled letters do NOT COMPLY with Federal regulations. (from the Best of JIR) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------